In 4 ways to a positive attitude, I guide you to reframe annoying negative thoughts that steal your peace.
Let’s face it. None of us likes to think unpleasant thoughts. We want to empty our heads of them. Unpleasant thoughts make us feel depressed, tired, overwhelmed, and anxious. They could be thoughts like:
I’m not good enough.
I fail at everything.
I’ll always be miserable.
If only we could rid ourselves of negative thoughts as easily as clicking the DELETE button or emptying the trash icon! If we could all flip a “positive thinking” switch on and feel instantly happy, calm, and connected we all would. But then there would be no new learning, new growth, or evolution. This is why positive thinking depends on our taking action. It requires us to do one thing.
Every time life presents us with a difficult situation, we can choose how we want to think about it.
- when someone cuts you off on the freeway
- when your sibling makes a mean remark about you
- when you’re struggling to learn a new task at a new job
You have a choice to think Jerk! How dare he!, My sister’s a mean bitch, I can never do anything right.
Or you can choose a more positive and empowering response such as: He needs to get somewhere in a big hurry, so let me send a blessing his way. I feel compassion because she’s creating so much suffering for herself. I am smart and I can do this with some patience.
This takes 1) a willingness to be aware of your thoughts 2) a willingness to choose differently 3) a willingness to work the positive thinking muscle.
It’s important to understand why we find it so easy to indulge in negative thinking.
Our brains are hardwired for negativity. This was necessary because man had to be able to scan his environment for danger back in the day when he lived in a cave and had to hunt for food. The human brain was wired to register any threat to personal safety. Your brain and mine does that even today. This is why we remember an insult much longer than we do compliments.
It takes real effort and willingness to train your brain to think positive. The good news? Our brains are malleable and can change and adapt to allow new information in and embrace a different way of thinking and doing. The problem is, we give up before we even begin. Because change is hard. It’s far easier to stay stuck in the same negative thought loops than train our brain to think a different way.
Here are some ideas to help you develop a more positive way of thinking:
- Love your thoughts. Your thoughts are your own. Good, bad, or ugly…can you love them? A thought that is I’m not smart enough came from a part of your childhood when you simply took on as truth what your parents or teachers told you. Now as an adult you get to question your thoughts and beliefs. Love the thought. And love the child who carried that thought. Now you can tell her that is not true and find ways to empower yourself.
- Brain dump. Every night before you go to sleep, pull out a journal and empty out all the negative thoughts that are running your life. This is a great way to pull all those thoughts from your subconscious. Now you can create room for more positivity.
- Gratitude journal. No matter how many times you’ve heard this, the power of gratitude is huge. When you focus on 3-5 hings that have gone right for you that day, you automatically train your brain to scan for what is working well.
- Invite beauty. When you create beauty or surround yourself with beauty, you tune in to more good feelings. Whether it is arranging flowers in a vase, creating art, or making origami, beauty has the power to lift us up. When we feel good, our minds and hearts are in a more positive zone.
If you’d like some guidance to deal with the non-stop chatter of your monkey-mind, I invite you to schedule a Single Session.