Grief, Prayers, And Policy

Grief, prayers, and policy can all work together beautifully. Let me explain. I had the blessing of traveling to Lourdes a week ago. It has been a dream of mine for many years and I was very emotional and grateful that it finally came true. I lit candles and prayed for all of us. On…

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Why We Feel Disconnected

Why we feel disconnected can be answered in many different ways. One of the biggest challenges of the pandemic era has been isolation. No watercolor conversations. No meeting friends for an impromptu dinner. No concerts, shows, movies in outdoor venues. And the hardest thing of all: the absence of connection when a loved one died.…

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Why is everyone so impatient with grief?

Why is everyone so impatient with grief?  Do you feel as if your close friends are watching you to feel into how you’re doing? Do you feel like your family members are hurrying you to “get over” your grief? Do you feel like you’re disappointing them all because your grief seems never-ending? ~~~~ I get…

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The Door That Opened For Me

The door that opened for me was the most unexpected one and it made no sense, but I walked in.  December 2008. A part-time position opened up at a retirement community, a job I was neither qualified for, nor felt excited about. As a brand-new immigrant, I knew nothing about seniors in the western world:…

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Why Comparison Hurts

Why comparison hurts and why it’s so much better to be grateful for what’s right here is a lesson that we must revisit. ithin a few months of moving to Marin County, CA it became obvious that we would soon move to Germany for my husband’s job. There was one problem. I’d fallen in love…

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Scared to Let Go of Your Past?

The past is not a problem to be solved. The past is a part of you that you're meant to outgrow.

Scared to let go of your past? A common theme I hear from clients all the time is this: I need to keep working on me. This comment makes me sad. It tells me that most people think there’s something inherently wrong with them, that they’re fundamentally flawed in some way. This is why they…

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We Are Not Guaranteed Tomorrow

We are not guaranteed tomorrow. When news of the basketball legend Kobe Bryant’s tragic death flashed on my phone, it felt surreal. No, I’m not a basketball fan. I’ve rarely watched a full game. And yet, his death hit home hard. My husband and daughter are huge fans of the game. But that’s not the entire reason…

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What Anger Taught Me

What anger taught me is a precious lesson I will carry with me all my life. In my twenties and thirties, anger was my weapon of choice. Growing up with an alcoholic father and a people-pleasing mother, I soon realized that being angry prevented others from taking advantage of me. Anger helped me feel powerful, strong, and…

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Your Brain Deletes Stuff When You’re Grieving

Your brain deletes stuff when you're grieving

Your brain deletes stuff when you’re grieving. In the weeks and months after my mother’s death, I thought I was going crazy.  I couldn’t read a page without feeling like I’d lost my mind. Because when I got to the end of the page I no longer remembered what I’d just read. I forgot characters’…

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My Failed Attempts to Improve My Life

flipping through the pages of a book

My failed attempts to improve my life have taught me an important lesson: all my attempts to fix myself are at the level of my ego. I need to let that go. I believe with every cell in my being that I am an old soul. A part of me has known this even when…

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