Do you feel like this when the same trigger keeps tripping you up over and over again? You thought you'd worked on it, overcome it, vanquished it. But here it is again, rearing its ugly head.
Yeah, me too.
So I'm gonna tell you how I deal with triggers. Hopefully it'll help you as well.
1. I accept that I'm human and the humans I'm in intimate relationship with WILL trigger me.
This takes the pressure off. So many of us struggle because of some silly belief that we're awakened spiritual beings who must not succumb to triggers. Let that go. Simply accept your humanness. It's easier.
2. I show my inner child some love and kindness.
A trigger is just old pain being reawakened by someone in this moment. You had a need when you were a child that was not met. Your dad promised to come home early so you could get ice cream, but never showed up. You felt abandoned. In this moment, your partner has forgotten your anniversary. You feel abandoned all over again. Broken trust is the problem. And what your inner child needs is some tender, loving care.
So, instead of going into "analysis" mode immediately (what is this trigger reminding me of?), I turn my attention to the child within and care for her. I offer her comfort, words of affirmation, or help her feel safe.
If you skip this step, your inner child will feel abandoned all over again. Just as she did in the past. Which is the thing that created the trigger in the first place.
3. Once I've felt my inner child's feelings, I introspect.
Once I've cried or felt the anger and taken care of my inner child, I go to analysis and introspection. I do this by journaling. Just brain dump everything I felt. And then I take it a step further and do soul writing. I dialogue with my soul to understand what's going on deep inside. What is a story I'm creating around the issue? How can I change my perspective? What is the lesson and wisdom I need to open to?
This 3-step process works pretty well for me. Try it and do let me know if it worked for you.
Sending you much love,