Slowing Down Grief

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Grief has a rhythm all its own. In our haste to speed our recovery, we rush around frenetically trying to find the instant-formula, or 3-quick-steps to grief relief. We make our expectations clear to a coach or counselor: I don’t have too much time. I need to get over this grief thing asap. Do you specialize […]

How Do You Say Goodbye?

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A couple of months ago, my family and I were at King’s Cross Station in London. My 21-year-old daughter was taking a connection to Leavesden, the studio where the famous Harry Potter movies were filmed. It was a huge day for her, an ardent Potter fan, a longed-for moment that had finally arrived. As she prepared to leave, I […]

10 Ways to Cope with a Difficult Loss

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When you lose a loved one, grief knocks you over no matter how strong you are. Here are ten strategies that will help you in coping with the transition. 1) Feel your Feelings. Allow feelings to bubble up to the surface: shock, anger, denial, sadness, fear. Everyone’s grief is as individual as their fingerprints, so […]

“Being” with the dying

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In Last Acts of Kindness: Lessons for the Living from the Bedsides of the Dying, Judith Redwing Keyssar writes: “People tend to do what makes them feel comfortable when a loved one is dying. In an attempt to control their emotions, some make food, some drink, others make plans and others take long walks. There […]

What Grief does to you (Part 1)

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Our individual experience of grief is as unique as our DNA or fingerprint. While our shared humanity does trigger certain standard responses to the loss of a loved one, not all of us experience every one of them, or in the same order. The Shock of Loss: “This is not happening to me.” Call it […]